Another bittersweet ending and one of the most difficult balancing acts I’ve had to endure in my life will officially conclude in less than a week. For the past two years (plus) I have been balancing being a mother, wife, daughter, friend, career woman, and graduate student…. Not to mention sanity, trying to keep my sanity during this time has been a feat in itself. I have had to function during the day with only 2-3 hours of sleep, multiple days in a row. To be a supportive wife, dedicated mother, diligent student, accomplished career woman, and available daughter and friend, are not easy roles to fulfill, and were difficult to manage at times. The past two years have been laden with guilt, for the times I could not be strictly dedicated to my family, especially my young child; overflowing with pressure and stress; yet full of accomplishments and successes. It has been a great balancing act, one of the most difficult ones yet, and I’m sure not the last. The key to it all was that it was my choice, and I knew I wanted to do it, all of it, and worked hard to accomplish it all, and achieve my goals.
I couldn’t have done it without the support of my family, especially my husband, who took on added duties in support of me following my dreams; the unwavering support of my parents, the encouragement of my friends and colleagues; and the small voice that whispered I love you mommy, with her small arms tightly wrapped around my neck; it’s for her, her future.
I am grateful to them and thank you for taking time out of your, undoubtedly packed, day to read my blog posts. All our time is precious, and I thank you for allowing me to be a part of yours.
Cheers, to two of the longest years of my life!
“We never know how high we are
Till we are called to rise;
And then, if we are true to plan,
Our statures touch the skies.”
— Emily Dickinson
With all this talk about YOUR goal, and YOUR path, it’s easy to get tunnel vision, and forget or ignore what you can do for others, who may also be trying to change their paths, make different choices, and achieve their goals. We need to remember to assist each other, and help each other out. If you can help a co-worker or classmate, or friend with a project or task, by all means, DO IT! You are not only helping them accomplish their goal, but you are also helping yourself. Your contribution does not go unnoticed, and it is thoughtfully accepted, and greatly appreciated; and next time, you will have a supporter and contributor for your projects for the future. Although, if, on the off chance, your contribution is not appreciated and you no gratitude is noticed, then next time perhaps don’t assist, unless you have plenty of time to do so.
Now, I want to take the time to talk about a phenomenon, that has happened to me personally. It is about assistance and helping (or NOT, as this case is) others in the work place, from/to a specific type of person/s… Women in high-level positions, assisting other women. I am a woman, an educated woman, not young (but not too old either), and I have felt the opposite of assistance in my past experiences. I was not only, not assisted in my career, but deterred, and my requests for additional projects and responsibilities ignored, this all from another woman, in a high-level position, who had the ability to assist me in my goals, but chose to take a different course. I believe I know her reasons, and I can continue to speculate them, but in the end, all that matters, is that I, and other women, should NOT continue this unfortunate practice of holding our comrades down. We must collaborate with them, all of them, the hims, and the HERS. We all have goals we want to achieve and receiving help along the way, always makes the ride more enjoyable, and feel that much shorter.
So go forth, stay your course, and if you can help others along the way, by all means do so (especially you ladies!), it won’t go unnoticed.
“The more women help one another, the more we help ourselves. Acting like a coalition truly does produce results. Any coalition of support must also include men, many of whom care about gender inequality as much as women do.” ~ Sheryl Sandberg, Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead